Saturday, February 13, 2010

Mirror Mirror


Today you rocked Logan to sleep and watched yourself do it in the standing mirror you have in your bedroom. Just you and your tired little 6 1/2 month old infant in afternoon's fading light. You thought a lot in those five minutes about how you were a better father to Avery than you have been to Logan. How you've seen a lot worse dads but then you've seen better and so that wasn't a lot of comfort...

You wanted to make a New Year's Resolution (in February) to be better but those are always gone within a week so instead you just rocked her back and forth and looked at her eyes fading and you caught sight of yourself a lot, thinking you could be the greatest father or the worst and the world could care less. But this is your testimony. Every day. And you could maybe be doing better. And even without a "resolution" you quietly felt resolved...

No comments:

Post a Comment